Day 13: Moms are Special People

Twenty months ago today, at 4:41 p.m., I became Little C’s mom. Well, I suppose that really happened about nine months earlier, but that was the moment we met face to face.

Hospital

Words can’t describe the last 20 months. It’s been amazing, difficult, joyful, worrisome, stressful, and better than I ever, EVER imagined. Especially since I was pretty convinced that I’d never have the opportunity to bear a child of my own.

A four-year journey through infertility had finally led me to make peace with the idea that our family may never grow biologically, and I was ready to explore foster care and adoption. We became licensed foster parents but had not yet had the chance to care for any children when we found out Little C would be joining us in March of 2013.

Easter 2013

I was thrilled beyond my wildest dreams and scared like I’ve never been scared before, all at the same time.

I think that pretty much sums up motherhood, no matter how old your kids are. They are, simultaneously, the source of unimaginable joy and deepest concern, and I didn’t fully understand that until that afternoon when Big C had the pleasure of announcing to the room “It’s a little girl. And she’s beautiful.”

I know Little C and I will have our days – weeks – maybe even months – when we don’t get along. It’s what happens between mothers and daughters as one is trying to hold on to the little girl in pigtails and the other is stretching her wings to fly out of the nest. I just pray that no matter what we may be at odds about, that I always make sure Little C knows I love her unconditionally and will do anything in my power to keep her safe and help her make right choices in her life.

Baraboo

And I hope, someday, she will be able to experience the amazing phenomenon that is motherhood, whether it’s children she carries in her womb or children she chooses to love through foster care or adoption. It’s truly one of the greatest gifts a woman can receive.

Little C, my little farm girl, I wish you a happy “birthday” today and pray that one day, you too may know what it feels like to be somebody’s momma.

In case you missed one:

Day 1

Day 2

Day 3

Day 4

Day 5

Day 6

Day 7

Day 8

Day 9

Day 10

Day 11

Day 12

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